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Effortlessly Average

Sort of half-heartedly leading the charge into mediocrity since, oh, let's say around 1987 or so.

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Location: Roaming (additional charges may apply), Argentina

Proof that with internet access and a powerful laxative, even insipid people will blog; the place where your excellence and my mediocrity collide; where my Karma whips ass on your dogma.

Friday, February 15, 2008

Short and... Who Cares, Just Read it Anyway

So no, I'm not dead. Nor in any kind of funk that's got me not posting. No, not jail either. I'd love to say I've run off with a carload of Hooter's girls and a box of Trojans, but alas, I'm in California, negotiating for a new job that could give me a six figure salary again.

But I also kinda like all you beotches, so I wanted to drop in to post something. I kept my eyes open for an opportunity and when it presented itself, I boosted this computer from a 16 year old at Starbucks who left it unattended while he evacuated his venti soy latte. Imagine how surprised he will be when he returns to realize that he's sent hate mail to "President" Bush, downloaded 14 copies of the same song from a Chinese piracy site, and had his home page changed to midgettripods.com.

I will of course fill each and every one of you in personally when I return to H-town (aka "the center of the universe" to those who live there). In the meantime I offer you this question:

Do you think it was wrong of me to phone pizza and doughnut deliveries to the weight loss surgery seminar that was being held at my hotel? Just wondering.

Oh, and I know you went out to see if there really is a site about midgets with huge schlongs. You pervs.

I'm out!

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