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Effortlessly Average

Sort of half-heartedly leading the charge into mediocrity since, oh, let's say around 1987 or so.

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Location: Roaming (additional charges may apply), Argentina

Proof that with internet access and a powerful laxative, even insipid people will blog; the place where your excellence and my mediocrity collide; where my Karma whips ass on your dogma.

Thursday, June 12, 2008


So I'm working on this deep, philosophical post about a major life change that I'm about to go through. And it's got everything: sex, drugs, music, boobies, drama, opinion, sword fights, escapes, adventure... you name it; it's in there.

But it's taking me a while because The Man has me preoccupied.

So in lieu of an actual post, I'm going to throw out there a lazy blog just to let you all know I'm thinking about you even when so many of you couldn't give a crap about me. heh. Think about it this way: you'll be back on your porn site (or Perez Hilton's) in two minutes flat.

A) Four places that I go over and over again: Starbucks, California, Home, State of Denial

B) Four people who e-mail me (regularly): My kids' homeschool group, myself (I send myself emails when I want to remind me to do something), The "enlarge your penis in two minutes a day" people, Some schmo in Nigeria who wants me to believe he's an African royal who's trying to protect his country by using me to transfer $100,000,000 using my name and will pay me a 1% gratuity if I front him $10,000 (I'm seeing how long I can keep him on the hook).

C) Four of my favorite places to eat: Home, with family; a little cafe in Santa Monica that looks out over the beach; another small cafe in Mexico that serves an amazing tomato and cheese salad (only been there a couple times, but man if I could go there more often...); oh, and I suppose Chili's.

D) Four places I would rather be right now: traveling in my RV; somewhere I've never been before; somewhere private with someone I love; in Eva Mendez's knickers.

E) Four TV shows I watch over and over: The Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson; The "George W" Down Home Denial Channel; Survivorman; the day's material from the camera I've hidden in Dick Cheney's bedroom.

F) Four people I think will respond: FBI; DHS; George's mommy; my fellow punk bandmates: "The Squishy Tumors."

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